Alpha Framing: The Key To Lifestyle Changes - Take It Slow
Edwin Tan
New Year’s Resolutions. That tradition that defies all other traditions by…somehow making it traditional not to observe it. Who keeps these things? Who sits down on the 1st of January, makes a goal, and follows through with it? Oh, right. Nobody. It’s commonly said that if you really wanted to change your life, you’d have changed it already. You don’t need an arbitrary starting point like the beginning of a new year to do it. And if you do…well, it’s not going to happen.
That’s the running hypothesis, anyway. Now me, I don’t know. I usually find it easier to keep to a goal if I give myself some time to get used to it before I start. Maybe that’s what these things are for: neurotic people like me. Well, if you’re a neurotic person like me, maybe you plan on transitioning into a new habit in 2012. In that case, follow me as I take you along a path of age-old wisdom, nuggets of insight, and fluffy little bunny rabbits. ‘Cuz everything’s better with those. Right?
A lot of people make the mistake of jumping headfirst into a goal. To bring it back, that’s the reason New Year’s Resolutions have such a bad reputation. We leap forward, make a whole bunch of changes in our lives, get ourselves all burned out, and drop them all in a week-and-a-half because…well, damn it, this is hard. And it is. Changing your life is supposed to be hard. If it were easy, it wouldn’t be worth doing.
Notice that I used the word “transitioning” up a couple paragraphs ago. Whether you’re moving into a new home, a new city; whether you’re starting a new job, a new diet, a new hobby, or a new business; whether you’re taking up jet-skiing or cutting out carbohydrates, the key to success is transition. Slow and steady wins the race, or so the fable goes, and slow and steady changes the lifestyle.
Let’s say you want to lose some weight, start living healthy, this year. You hear about all these miracle diets, and these supplements and appetite suppressants, and…various other snake-oil tactics. You see those ads from Google Adsense, talking about how there’s only ONE rule to looking like a supermodel, and it’s something that the health industry doesn’t want you to know. But, in order to learn this special secret, you have to pay through the nose.
Well, I’m here to tell you that rule, right here: ease into it. The key to losing weight is as simple as the basic math you learned in elementary school. Burn more calories than you take in. Watch what you eat, keep track of it, and exercise so as to ensure that you’re burning through it, and then some. That’s all there is to shedding the pounds. Sure, that sounds easy, but it’s hard! Well, the reason it’s hard, and the reason so many of us want to think that there’s an easier way, is because we all too often make the snap decision to cut out all the “bad” things we eat, all at once, and throw ourselves at the gym for hours on end.
That might work for the aforementioned week-and-a-half. Maybe even as long as a couple months, if you’re lucky. But the problem is that your body craves what you give it. It learns to depend on what it gets. So if you just randomly decide to cut out everything, your body won’t like it. You’ll get sick of it. You have to let your body get used to the idea that you’re going to be changing things up from now on.
See, “going on a diet” is little more than a farce. It carries with it this connotation that you can do it for a while, get the results you want, and then stop. Like you can eat nothing but white rice and boiled chicken to fuel your workout binge for a couple of months, supplementing it with water and protein powder, and then suddenly you’ll look like one of “the beautiful people” on those magazines. You’ll be healthy. And then you can go back to eating all those things you really like, ‘cuz hey. You can keep the weight off once you lose it. You just need to sacrifice for a little while to get there.
That is, in no uncertain terms, the perfect method…if you’re aiming to fail.
We aren’t built to do that. It’s nowhere near that simple. The key isn’t to stop eating fast food immediately and forever. The key is to start slow. No, the “healthy” options aren’t much better than the…well, not healthy options. But let’s say you’re a discerning, purebred American man, and you like the Bacon Ultimate Cheeseburger from Jack in the Box. Next time you head there, go for the regular version. Sure, cutting out the bacon really doesn’t do much, and obviously if you’re in danger of a heart attack already, this method isn’t going to help much. But it’s a start, a step in the right direction, and that’s the way to go. I’m not saying to cut the bacon out of that sandwich once or twice. I’m saying that you cut it out of your habit completely. Then you find something else that’s bad for you, that you can cut out completely. No excuses. It’s gone.
You’re not going on a diet. You’re changing your lifestyle. You’re changing what you eat, and how you eat it, for the rest of your life. Use low-calorie cooking spray instead of canola oil when you make eggs for breakfast. And when you make those eggs, only use one yolk (if you must), and supplement it with whites if you want some more substance. Use wheat bread for sandwiches. Use vinaigrettes instead of ranch or Thousand Island when you have a salad. Experiment. See what works and what doesn’t. Find healthy choices, small as they might be, to start yourself off. And slowly but surely, after a while you’ll realize that your entire diet has changed, and you don’t feel like you’re sacrificing anything anymore, because it’s just the way you live your life now.
The same goes with any other new decision, although the rules are a bit different. Say you want to move to a new city. Obviously you can’t ease into that. Once you move, that’s it. End of transition. But what you can do is research. Early, and thoroughly. Make sure that the place you’re moving is going to work for you. And if it’s one of those things where you have no choice; maybe it’s the only place you can afford right now, or maybe it’s the only place close enough to your new job to make the drive worthwhile. Then you make the transition as smooth as possible. Take it slow. Calm. Easy. Don’t panic, and most assuredly don’t just jump at the first idea that comes to mind. Knee-jerk life decisions don’t usually work out very well.
Want a new hobby? Not sure what to do? Try a little bit of everything. Even if you think it might be ludicrous or embarrassing, give it a try. Don’t like dancing? Go out and take lessons. Think those nerds who spend all their time playing World of Warcraft are wasting potential? Give it a try. If nothing else, you’ll understand why you hate it, next time you get into an argument with one of them.
Watch an episode of a show you usually make fun of. Read a book from an author you hate. Go out and do something you’ve never done before. But always remember to be calm, contemplative, and to have an open mind when you do it. It doesn’t matter if your goal for this new year is to lose 50 pounds, learn about a new culture, spice up the monotony of your daily routine, or simply expand your understanding of the universe.
A Man of the Hour keeps his head on straight.
