Parlor Talk: The Decline of Bars

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The bar scene used to a haven for people that sought solidarity and potvaliant riches of raconteurs but has devolved into a misfit of habitues of the worst form that exist only in spanogynys where the sex ratio is lopsided. This lopsided sex ration makes it difficult for men to aspire to consummate new relationships or philander with the beautiful menagerie that can still be witnessed at some bars. More and more people are meeting each other through the internet or internet applications bypassing the flummeries that are commonplace to bars which house more laggards than pioneers. So should we ditch the bar scene to convene at a more seasoned location? Perhaps we should because of the hackneyed nature of getting drunk and listening to subpar popular music and rap while fumbling around to talk to the few women who aren’t taken already. We need to cozy up around things that unite us better than a bar scene namely urbacity. When we find common ground there is more festivity and in some cases sports bars are peripheral to the past but central to the future.

Maybe the better approach besides sports bars which are good for forging friendships is to be circumforaneous and find a new niche with like-minded people rather than promiscuous barnacles to narrative deceptions and the snollygoster logic of consumerism. I contend that we must witness ourselves as participants in a broader reality that bars do not permit because often they are populated by the kind of people that are content with the pedestrian quidnuncs and primped into cossetted affection or predatory instinct by ravenous men. I suggest that instead of going to a bar (if you are a reader) you should visit your local bookstore and try to find people with similar tastes in books. You probably want to do this during the peak hours to avoid the duress of vacancy that besets less frequented locales. We should also celebrate vagrancy enough to traipse through the park and disengage our smartphones so that we can behold natural beauty while finding others who engage the same priorities. Another venue of interest is the gym because although it is strenuous it leads to cross-sex interaction that is heightened by the secretion of hormones during exercise and the runner’s high that corresponds to it.

Nevertheless, it depends where you live because if you live in a highly cosmopolitan environment and are ostentatious about wealth you might find yourselves at home at a luxurious establishment that might cater to more seasoned ears that the trashy kitsch that bombards us with cacophony at many other bars. Also if you live in a small town it might be the appropriate place to meet people because of the urbacity created by belonging to such an exclusive community. Nevertheless, suburban bars or low-key urban bars are rarely frequented by men and women of distinction because their pedigree gains them access to the heart of luxurious living and the effervescence of opportunism where people who have physical beauty linger with a catching array of others with those same properties.

So how do you navigate the declining bar scene. One of the most common mistakes is just choosing the bar closest to you rather than taking an extra leap to find an atmosphere that is draped with sophistication rather than crass and boorish repute. The world needs bars because they provide a vital function but because of the internet if you want to meet the girl of your dreams at a bar the odds are stacked against you. A better strategy would to be to attend nightclubs which are booming at the moment. In those environments everyone is tethered to a certain claque congregated around musical appreciation so finding concerts and nightclubs is certainly a better proposition than attending a random run-of-the-mill bar. I strongly exhort people to determine their niche and then explore that niche to the best of abilities without exorbitant costs incurred by the people that need to navigate far to find kinship. Ultimately, the key to the bar scene is knowing a lot of people but yet it is still dying because why get drunk and listen to trashy and gaudy kitsch when you can reside at your place with your friends and get drunk and converse in private while also having the advantages of comfort and easy recourse for sexual sublimation. Millennials are lazy spelunkers because they prefer the home or apartment setting to a frenzied free-for-all with many humgruffins they despise rather than treated to luxuriant comfort.

We should vacate the bars and shift the party to habitations big enough for festivity but carefully selected by the patrons and symposiarchs that gild opportunities from the wisp of the firmament. We need also to diversify where we go and who we go with because if that feat is accomplished the beatific solidarity of the future is clinched even at the demise of the bar scene.